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I totally had that poster when I was 10.
I’ve wanted to take up running for a long time. Years even. Planned to start. Talked about starting. Looked up races. Bought running shoes. But … I never actually started running.
I think a big part of what held me back is that I didn’t want to be bad at it. I didn’t want to have to walk, or find out I couldn’t go as far as I planned. I didn’t want to be slow, or look weird with my jaunty gait. I didn’t want to have to start running, I just wanted to be a runner already!
I’m, um, a little … competitive, maybe? Like the most competitive person in the whole world; nobody can be more competitive than me. That kind of competitive. It’s mostly internal. I try not to let it show. Too much. But it’s there. I want to win. Always.
But … I am slow, and awkward, and I have to walk. A lot. I am not good at this running thing yet.
I wasn’t able to do my training Monday or Tuesday. Let me re-phrase that. I didn’t do my training. I stayed up way too late Sunday night, then had to work late both days. I was really tired and focused on work and, well, gave myself a pass.
I did go running this morning. I did NOT want to get up when my alarm went off, but I told myself that I’d be happy I did it. And I was. Even though the run wasn’t all that great – actually, it freaked me out a little bit.
I am so bad at this, you guys!
Let’s take a look at my original training plan, shall we?
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
I was so confident I could just “pick this up,” no problem. But this morning I had to face the reality that this is going to be harder than I first thought. My job is pretty crazy right now, and I’ll likely have to work overtime indefinitely. I have never tried running before. And, until recently, (as in, the last few weeks), I really haven’t worked out consistently.
I thought about all of this during my run/walk this morning, and decided I needed to take a step back. I am still going to do the 5K in September(!!!), but I’m not going to plan to train for the quarter marathon in October. If anything, I might do another 5K, but for now I am focusing on one goal at a time. I also need to have a more structured plan to build up to a 5K. Instead of just saying I need to run X miles every X days, I am going to switch to the Couch to 5K program – albeit a condensed version since it is usually 9 weeks and I only have 7 1/2 weeks until my race! I still want to build strength, and am going to do more yoga – primarily focusing on my core for better stability.
So, here’s my new and improved more realistic plan (using the Couch to 5K strategy during my runs):
I talked with Allie about this today – about how frustrating it is to not just be good at it, and how I’m a little nervous about the 5K. I know it’s just 3 miles. And I know I can do it. I just REALLY don’t want to have to walk any part of it.
But, then again, I need to keep in mind my real goal in all of this. Sure, I would love to be some kind of rockstar runner, but my real goal is to create a substantial and lasting lifestyle change – a habit of health and exercise – that I will stick with long after my first 5K. I have to say, I am loving my more active life, and I already feel weird and antsy if I go more than a day without some exercise. I’ve been happier, less stressed, and more energetic. I feel better about my body, even though it is too early for there to be any visual change, just because I appreciate it more. A few years ago I could barely walk, and I didn’t know if I would spend my life in a wheelchair. I was in pain every day. And that could happen again.
So I am grateful for every morning I can wake my ass up at 5:45 a.m. and go running. That is a good thing.
I love the concept of facing reality without giving up – sometimes it’s about adjusting your plans.
Thank you, Caitlin! And thank you for being such an inspiration!! 🙂
I started running earlier this year, with the C25K plan. It was hard. I repeated every week from week 4 on. I started and gave up on C25K twice last year, and each time I quit before the week I was supposed to do the 20-minute run. This time, I was determined to do it. I allowed myself to repeat weeks to go stronger – after all, I’d never run a mile in my life and I spent last year in severe chronic pain with a back that has hurt since high school and will probably never be fully healed. And, this past weekend, I ran my first 5K race. I ran the whole thing! You are a rockstar for getting out of bed and taking any step. You can do it! And you know what – if you have to walk a bit during the 5K, that will be ok, too. You still got out there and did it, and you’ll probably love it and want to do it again. 🙂 Races are super fun!
p.s. I may have run my whole 5K but I was TOTALLY outpaced by people -including straight-up CHILDREN – who were run/walking. I still rocked it though. 😉
It’s nice to know I am in good company! Thank you for your story, and for the encouragement. I understand back pain – I had to have a major back surgery in 2003 – so it is nice to know that there are people dealing with that AND being active (and running entire races!).
I’m here from CaitlinHTP’s tweet to tell you to keep up the good work!! Celebrate every minute/mile/step you take, because it is one more minute/mile/step that the “old you” wouldn’t have done before!! Even buying running shoes and making a plan are BIG STEPS!! GOOD WORK!!
Thank you so much for the encouragement! That is something I need to keep telling myself, for sure! 🙂
Hey, I know about scheduling getting in the way. I didn’t start running until Dec 2010 and I couldn’t even run for 1 min without getting winded. I’m a working mom to a 5 year-old boy. I have to get up at 5:00 AM to get to work on time. And this is w/o working out before. It’s not easy. And I don’t always succeed. But I kept trying and I ran my first 5K in May of this year. Woo Hoo! You can do it!! Don’t beat yourself up if you can’t stick to a training plan perfectly.
Good for you! I can’t imagine how crazy your schedule must be! And thank you for the encouragement. It’s hard to see sometimes how being flexible and adjusting expectations doesn’t mean failure – and doesn’t mean I should quit!
I am also here via CaitlinHTPs tweet. Definitely do not give up. You can do it! I swear I never believed that I could run for 3 minutes let alone 3 miles. Now I can. I’m still slower than most but faster than I was in the beginning. Running is ultimately a competition against yourself. Hang in there. Looking forward to reading your 5K race recap! Good luck!!
Thank you! You are right! A friend of mine, also a runner, said I just need to accept the distance, rather than fight it. It’s all mental, right?!
*Hugs*
It’s just one step at a time, one mile at a time. Don’t put so much pressure on yourself. Discover why you want to run and hold onto that. Also, a great bunch of “running songs” can really get you pumped! You can do this!! 🙂
Thank you! I thinking holding onto the “why” will be key! 🙂 Also, I’m going to write a post sometime this weekend about running songs, so think of some suggestions!!
I 1000% needed to see this post. Thank you so much. I’m going through this right now.
Oh, it’s so nice to know I’m not alone! Are you signed up for a race? As completely freaked out as I am by mine, it has helped me so much in terms of motivation.
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